Google Brings Canned Responses To Gmail

Oh the shame that would result from being caught out by your parents...

Cyberspace has a lot to answer for when it comes to the destruction of the English language and now Google has a new idea on how to make it even worse…

The four-years-old-and-never-going-to-leave-beta Gmail will now give web users too lazy to even type their streams of vapid acronyms the option to insert ‘Canned responses’ in email responses. These can range from a stock catalogue of Google provided terms to your own favourite replies to emails you wish you’d never received.

“Gmail already lets you create filters based on a combination of keywords, sender, recipients, and more in your incoming messages,” explained the company on its official blog. “Turn on Canned Responses in Labs, and you can set a filter to grab one of your saved responses, create an automated reply, and hit the Send button for you.”

Rather cleverly Google has also added a feature whereby automated messages can be sent out for different keywords meaning, for example, anyone who types ‘Birthday’ in an email to you can automatically receive note that you’re currently suffering a midlife crisis, are out in your new red, phallic shaped new sports car and trying to attract women your daughter could’ve mothered. Or perhaps some party location details, you know – whatever suits.

”’In related news”’ Google Maps UK just added traffic information, so now your shiny red sports car will know the fastest route to the Students Union bar for your 40th Birthday bash. I sense a plan coming together….

via Google Blog

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