Disney needn’t worry, the Super Nintendo World theme park looks like torture

The trailer for the Super Nintendo World theme park has been let loose on the internet, and it’s sort of terrifying.

As part of an expansion to Universal Studios Japan, the Super Nintendo World theme park is set to open in Osaka in time for the Tokyo 2020 Olympics, with further parks set to open in the US and Singapore at a later date.

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To promote the impending grand opening a… let’s say intriguing trailer was posted to YouTube, featuring Trusted Reviews‘ favourite Charli XCX, in its concept-filled music video. Take a look for yourself:

Looks a bit scary really, doesn’t it?

Aside from the somewhat puzzling name choice of Super Nintendo World given its very Mario-centric approach (sorry, Luigi, Zelda and the rest), we can’t help but feel if our parents took us to the theme park as kids we’d take one look and run in the other direction. Heck, as a full grown adult we’d probably still approach with caution.

Featuring a dingy passage of thwomps sure to crush you to death if you don’t have super sonic speed (yeah, he wasn’t included either), there’s also the small matter of gigantic green pipes with enough strength to suck actual astronauts out of space.

If we were to hazard a guess, we’d assume the reasoning for this is to symbolise the universal enjoyment of Nintendo, its games and consoles and thus its new theme park.

Still, it’s all a bit overwhelming and, at the end of the mad dash through aforementioned thwomps, as well as Piranha Plant minefields and angry Goombas, the Super Nintendo World theme park looks like a bit of a death trap.

Obviously the trailer is just a showcase of concept footage. However, the #WeAreMario hashtag would lead us to believe our suspicions it will largely be the Italian plumber in the red hat stealing the show in this gamers’ haven, which seems not only unfair but also a failure in meeting the theme park’s full potential. Then again, perhaps it’s just an excuse to suck more people in later on with the launch of further land expansions, much like Disney’s array of expansive amusement parks.

Regardless of any real safety concerns, the trailer does still fall a bit flat. Considering it’ll be opening ahead of the Tokyo 2020 Olympics, we’d expect the park to have a lot more to show for itself, giving us a sneak peak of what sort of rides, stores and overall themes to expect, aside from confirmation there will be a Mario Kart ride (via The Verge).

As glimpsed in the trailer, visitors will also be given a nifty wearable aptly named ‘Power Up Bands’, allowing wearers to connect to the smartphone app and track adventures around the theme park.

There is also reported to be an opportunity to collect digital coins around the park and compete against other visitors. The point for this has yet to be unveiled, but we imagine there will be some kind of reward none the less. Perhaps a gigantic Yoshi plushie?

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