Iâ€™m a professional, damn it, and Iâ€™m going to finish this review, so I soldier on for another ten minutes. It doesnâ€™t help that this level seems even more confusing than the last one, and Durandal has a horrible habit of suddenly surrounding you with enemies, forcing you to go into a frenzy of good old-fashioned back peddling and circle-strafing to survive. Then it hits me that thereâ€™s a very real chance that I might actually be sick. Iâ€™m getting to the point where I can taste breakfast, and it doesnâ€™t taste that good the second time aroundâ€¦
So I go off and have a lie down. As I collapse on the sofa, I start listing in my head all the times Iâ€™ve felt this ill or worse. All of them involve alcohol, kebabs, yachts, cross-channel ferrys, dodgy fried chicken or more than one of the above. None of them involve a video game. Maybe itâ€™s the smooth, speedy movement and rapid rotation, but Durandal has left me feeling pretty rotten.
After half an hour or so and a glass of water I feel ready to carry on, but five minutes of fruitless liquid-filled corridor wandering later, I feel as sick as the proverbial parrot. I email our famously reasonable editor and admit that I might be unable to complete the review without a boatload of Kwells and a lot of rest in-between short sessions. We agree it might be better to look at something else.
So there you have it. From a perusal of comments on the Web, I know Iâ€™m not the only one whose had a similar experience, so if I can recommend anything from my short time with Marathon 2 â€“ a time in which I proved unable to look at the enhanced multiplayer options or experience the full depth of the single-player campaign â€“ itâ€™s that itâ€™s a game you should try before you buy. Usually I say this because I think the game in question will appeal to some of you, but not to others, but here I say it for your own financial and physical wellbeing. After all, do you want to spend 800 MS Points on a game you canâ€™t â€“ literally - stomach playing?
Can someone with an iron nerve and a stainless steel stomach tell us what they thought?