No, we're not taking the you-know-what.
Ok, so let’s not beat around the bush. The Nintendo Revolution finally has an official name and it’s silly… darn silly… laugh out loud silly.
Someone, somewhere with clearly too much influence has decided the best way to market the next generation games console across the globe is to call it the Wii (yes, that ”is” pronounced “Wee”). I must admit, it took three emails and a follow up phone call to make me believe a press release entitled “Introducing Wii” was not an overdue April fools. It wasn’t and so whatever does it mean?
Personally, I find myself unable to get past the sniggering point so I’ll have to quote Nintendo directly:
”Wii sounds like “we,” which emphasizes this console is for everyone. Wii can easily be remembered by people around the world, no matter what language they speak. No confusion. No need to abbreviate. Just Wii. Wii has a distinctive “ii” spelling that symbolizes both the unique controllers and the image of people gathering to play. And Wii, as a name and a console, brings something revolutionary to the world of video games that sets it apart from the crowd. So that’s Wii. But now Nintendo needs you. Because, it’s really not about you or me. It’s about Wii. And together, Wii will change everything.”
Now I swear to God that I made absolutely none of that up. That’s it word-for-word. Consequently, it must go down as possibly the most ludicrous branding decision in gaming history. I mean can you imagine to linguistic horror parents are going to face over this: “Mum, mum, I need a Wii”, “Why can’t I have a Wii?” and – mostly likely – “I don’t want a Wii”.
Now this may or may not be urban legend but I understand that researchers renamed Arthur Anderson “Accenture” after finding it has no unpleasant connotations in any language in existence. Oh for just a smidgen of that investigative nous from Nintendo.
Besides, is it just me or was there absolutely nothing wrong with the name “Revolution”?!?!